A Rugby Tribute to Peter David Yarr

Scotland beat England at Twickenham, Sailing in Croatia, Touring Chile North to South and a Rugby World Cup. We packed the best days in that we could.

The words I never wanted to write, but that have been written for sometime now. On October 30th 2021 at around midday, my Father, Peter David Yarr, passed away peacefully in the Bristol Royal Infirmary, with his hands in ours. Many of you probably knew him as Dave. He hated that name. He was always a David but he never really wanted to kick up a fuss. 

It feels weird to write about this on my blog- as if I’m selling the story, using our grief and loss to build my platform, but my thoughts are as follows: my love of rugby, my enjoyment of writing and conviction to do what I want and what I feel is right, was fostered and encouraged by that man (and of course my lovely Mother) and all I want to do is tell the world about how brilliant he was. If you have enjoyed any of my work, or a conversation with me or anyone close to him, then you too like and appreciate a little bit of what David Yarr was all about, and that’s a huge comfort.

Dad (right) and his fellow elite coaching team many moons ago, sharing the best of their knowledge on a ferry to France, circa 11am.

There are too many words I could scribble, so I saved my musings for a more formal setting. I just want to briefly touch on rugby here. Once a hooker for St Brendan’s Rugby club in Bristol, Dad soon became a coach for my age-group rugby team at Nailsea & Backwell Rugby Club, teaching us all he knew on the field, as well as making a considerable contribution to our knowledge of beer consumption off it. When we started out we were often on the end of total drubbings, 100 point losses and the like. But whilst every other age-grade team seemed to be struggling for numbers, we consistently had a large squad, with every player given an opportunity. The coaches efforts eventually culminated in a half-respectable rugby team by the time we graduated to Colts. Fast forward and be it as players, coaches, referees or bloggers, the influence endures, a testament to Dad and his fellow coaches.

Dad’s love of rugby shone through right until the end, and it was often a provider of great entertainment through his darkest days (though he didn’t think much of the Lions Tour to South Africa!). The last game we watched together was less than a week before we lost him- it was Saracens vs Wasps and I still remember him commenting about how he’s never been to a worse stadium more bereft of atmosphere than the Sarries one. He also made me aware (as if I wasn’t already) of his bug-bear of line-out and scrum put in’s not being straight, highlighting the fact that they don’t even pretend anymore, as commentators now refer to it as a feed. Certainly an old front-rower who felt an art form had been lost or diminished. He always wanted me to write that article and maybe one day I will.

From diagnosis to now took a remarkably short amount of time, but somehow, as a family we feel composed- again Dad’s honesty and openness to discuss his illness, his fate and our futures, influencing and guiding us through. We made the best of Dad’s life right until the end, and we’ll make the best of life from here onwards. 

I’ll sign off with a few thank yous, and have also left links to donate to the two charities who have been and will be there for our darkest days- please give what and if you can.

• First of all to our family & friends who have been there for us, in a big or small way- thank you. There are too many of you, but you know who you all are.

• To my Nailsea & Backwell age-grade rugby team that Dad coached, who bought him a signed Bristol shirt, donated to Macmillan and sent him a card in his final weeks- thank you. You lifted him at a crucial time.

• To Tom Tainton of Bristol Bears who arranged the signed shirt, as well as arranging a short eulogy at the Northampton Saints game, and to Bristol Bears Director of Rugby Pat Lam, who sent him a message of hope & prayers, thank you.

• To Mark Camburn of Bolivia Rugby for trying his damnedest to sort Dad a shirt and message from Gregor Townsend and for raising a dram in his honour. Your efforts mean a lot.

• To everyone who has supported the Scribbler over the years, particularly those of you who chose to support my sister in her triathlon for Macmillan & CLIC.

• To my Mother and Sister- thank you for being there through this all- I’m proud of how we’re all coping, and I know Dad is too.

• Finally to Dad. We were lucky enough to be able to see you out of this life with the dignity you deserved, hand in hand, and with our final messages. Thank you for everything you have always and will always continue to give us.

For now, I have some grieving, a David Yarr planned holiday, and a significant wine-legacy to make a dent in. Normal sporadic scribbling services to return in 2022, with some great interviews lined up. See you all soon.

Donate:

Cancer charity donation – Make a donation now – Macmillan Cancer Support

Donate – Young Lives vs Cancer

The Rugby Scribbler

30th November, 2021

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